Spotty Service and Spotty Plates at the Spotted Horse

“Onions and bacon cooking up just makes your kitchen smell so good. In fact, one day I’m going to come up with a room deodorizer that smells like bacon and onions. It’s a fabulous smell”.

Paula Deen

Last weekend most of my extended family and I traveled to the Spotted Horse (26 Church Ln, Westport, CT, http://spottedhorsect.com), to try someplace we have never been before. The Spotted Horse is located in a very nice area of Westport and has indoor seating, as well as outdoor seating. The beautiful outdoor seating area is covered with a bright, vivid, orange canopy to protect it from the weather.

As we walked into the restaurant, we noticed the sleek, farmhouse-esque atmosphere with an abundance of horse pictures, to remain true to their name (surprisingly, not all of them were spotted). When we sat down we started studying the menu right away.

As our large family began ordering, our waitress seemed to be getting irritated. She angrily sped through the rest of the orders. Unfortunately, she forgot my younger brother and I, as a result of her angry personality. She then proceeded to storm back to our table and irately ask what we wanted to eat.

To start, I ordered a Lobster Mac and Cheese. The Mac and Cheese was made with perfectly cooked pasta and was erupting with melted, warm, gooey cheese in every crack and crevice. The dish was covered with toasted bread crumbs and was sprinkled with flavorful, mouth-watering truffle oil and chewy, rubber-like lobster. The dish was actually quite good and was served in a unique way (in a skillet). My older brother ordered the same dish as his appetizer, but it unfortunately it came with the entrees.

Cheesy Goodness

Cheesy Goodness

Next we ordered Calamari. The Calamari was crispy, and crunchy, while also being served in great abundance.

Something smells fishy.

Something smells fishy.

My Mom and Grandma both order the beet salad. Sadly, my Mom’s went MIA.

Call the police, I am reporting a missing beet.

Hello 911, I am reporting a missing beet.

In addition to the Mac and Cheese, I ordered a subpar B.L.T.— Now, bacon, lettuce, and tomato sandwiches are a lifestyle to me, and when there is a below average tasting sandwich, it bothers me. I think I have probably had about 60 BLT’s from Spic and Span in Southport and I have also had many other BLT’s in my lifetime, some containing more than a pound of bacon!

The BLT at the Spotted Horse was not great. The sandwich was squeezed in between two: over toasted, under-buttered slices of bread and contained a half flimsy, limp, flaccid piece of bacon that did not nearly satisfy my craving for pork. In addition, the sandwich contained two wilted pieces of lettuce and a soggy tomato slice. Yuck… The sandwich was served with floppy, undercooked fries. Some of my family members described the fries as disappointing.

Not high on my list of BLT's.

Not high on my list of BLT’s.

In addition we got an order of Crispy Vegetarian Spring Rolls. The spring rolls were packed with fresh, cooked vegetables and were served with a sweet, thick, bright vivid Thai Chili Dipping Sauce. The dish was a little strange and was a weird addition to the menu.

A strange addition to the menu.

A strange addition to the menu.

Many members of my family also ordered tender, succulent, juicy burgers with crispy, salty fries that seemed to be a big hit among them.

For dessert we ordered several different kinds of chilling, cold, refreshing ice cream. I asked for three scoops of Mint Chocolate Chip Ice Cream, and our fantastic waitress brought us one scoop of Mint Chip and two scoops of Vanilla.

To top off the excellent night, we were given a small plate containing the carcass of a injured insect. This insect was served with a slice of birthday cake.

Oh yes, and did I mention, my Mom stepped on half of a cold, dank burger on the way out!

I would give it ZV- 1 1/2 Z’s- Eh. I wouldn’t recommend a visit anytime soon.

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